Transforming Love

15 08 2008

lovers
The moment you have in your heart this extraordinary thing called love and feel the depth, the delight, the ecstasy of it, you will discover that for you the world is transformed. –Jiddu Krishnamurti

I’ve always been intrigued by love; what is it? where do we find it? how do we get it? how to hold on to it? how to make it grow and last?

I’m sure many of you feel the same way.

To love someone is that magical state where we are not only loving without expecting anything back, but loving the person as it is. It’s feeling that connection that opens our heart and allow us to become vulnerable to someone else. Scary as it sounds it is the only way to really connect. Being in love are moments in time when we feel truly alive, we almost live in a completely different world within ourself and our experiences.

What is your experience with Love?


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3 responses

17 08 2008
arthenn

Oh Boy! I could go on and on with this one Clary.

(I’ve always been intrigued by love; what is it? where do we find it? how do we get it? how to hold on to it? how to make it grow and last?)

As one that has gotten married young. I question myself today if I ever really was in love when I got married. Not saying I never loved the woman I’m married to today, I do but my feeling for her today are a lot different than they ever have been than they were thirty-years ago.

When I first met my wife to be who I dated four years before asking her to marry me she was three years in college and I was only a sophomore in High School never letting her know I was still in High School afraid I would loose the one woman I really loved.

I dated, if you want to call it dating my freshman year in High school and I could not find any of the girls i would really be interested in except for one that was already be commented to a best friend of mine.

She liked me and I liked her but it would mean causing a conflict of friendship between three friends. Looking for friendship other places at this was at the work place where I met my wife. LOL

The memories while I think back as I type this comment. OH Man! How Much I really thought I was in Love.

Looking back, I’m thinking I was more respectful of her than I was really in love with her. (Courtship) I’m thinking right now, when you are nineteen and the one you feel and think you are in love with is twenty-one what the heck is (courtship) I never courted my wife in the four years of dating her.

My thoughts today looking back then are simple…I never really got to know my wife as a real relationship of a man and woman. We were virgins, I’m proud of this. But at the same time without going into detail here as I’m not a good writer as explaining myself (There really was no intimacy) of four years dating.

Now as a writer of poetry I’m always writing in the style of romance and sensuality 99.9% of the time This is the voice I hear and this is my style and how I express myself in a way of wanting to love, Its a new way of loving and I’m still trying to figure out what to do with the action of my words, trying to lift them of the pages and put them in to motion.

So this is a new era as I face the crossroads of mans (Midlife Crises) a journey that I have to walk carefully stopping along the way at all flashing red lights before crossing the intersections of life being careful that I don’t step of into a warning that says (STOP) when I’m wanting to keep (GOING) and forgetting what I have.

Its really difficult to explain and the only way to keep going is for me to continue to write and learn how to court this beautiful soul of a woman I’ve been married to for thirty years.

I know the mid life crises of a person is a journey but I wish it would end soon in showing me what the out come is going to be.

(To love someone is that magical state where we are not only loving without expecting anything back)

What you say here is the main part of survival I think. I’m wanting to be loved back…LOL and its not there and Frustration! settles in.

Anyway with all that said, I better leave as I don’t explain myself well. LOL

Clary Thank you for sharing this piece.

3 09 2008
Sherita Searcy

(To love someone is that magical state where we are not only loving without expecting anything back)

What you say here is the main part of survival I think. I’m wanting to be loved back…LOL and its not there and Frustration! settles in.

…..

I just wanted to ditto that comment. Love has been a really hard lesson for me…one that I really have to be patient with. Yes I am easily frustrated when the love is not returned …it makes the process of loving someone that much harder. So the question then becomes how do you love in the pit of personal frustration? What love can overcome that — are we not truly loving ourselves enough? Hummmm..just makes me wonder. Smile

3 09 2008
clary

Sherita, I believe that if you are in the position of waiting for that love to return to you and it doesn’t that you stop yourself and evaluate the relationship. There is no reason why -even when you love- to stay in a one sided relationship, we deserve much more than that. To love again is very possible to anyone who is open to it, it might take time but it will worth it. What you say is true, we need to love ourselves enough to break away and wait for that someone who will love us just as much or more than we love them.

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