Loneliness in our Life

“Loneliness and the feeling of being unwanted is the most terrible poverty.” Mother Teresa

Nobody wants to be lonely, we can tolerate to be alone but lonely is a completely different situation. In order for us to feel lonely we find ourselves misunderstood, judged, ignored or rejected. It is not because someone tell us, sometimes actions alone leave us with this lonely feeling with nowhere to turn. At times it can be us who decide to stay on the sidelines instead of exposing our heart one more time to so much hurt and anguish.

It is unfortunate that we many times tend to attach our value as a person by the attention we manage to create or receive from others. The first person who should have our attention is ourselves. Since we can’t control what anyone feels, thinks or do, our best bet is to become our best allied. When we know our own values as a human being the world consequently knows about it because we make it known. We need to communicate it clearly. People know how to treat us because we allow them to do so freely. It is critical to express the way we feel about their treatment towards us especially when such treatment is non acceptable by our standards. When dealing with our parents or people who have authority over us or we are dependent upon, it is important we are not only respectful but clear about the way we feel. By saying how their words, actions or lack of action makes us feel we are not offending anyone, simply put, we are protecting ourselves.

I really enjoy my moments alone, they are times to reflect, to read and become creative but to be lonely is a painful feeling I prefer not to experience. When our soul is unable to connect to another we find ourselves feeling lonely. We can be in a room full of people or surrounded by family and friends and feel lonely. A lot of people are willing to take but they never give and that is what a relationship is all about. Trust is another issue; if we can’t open our heart to anyone, we might as well be alone.

Our heart needs to rest in the tranquility of love and understanding. To end with loneliness we need to be able to open up to others without fear. I know by experience we many times withhold our feelings for fear or hurting someone else but the reality is that we are hurting the person who should be most important to us, ourselves. We are called to love others as we love ourselves, if we can’t do that then what good is it to even try to love? I believe love is the one thing we can’t live without but few know how.

Let’s not be afraid to look deep within and learn to love us, it is in that love that we will be able to love someone else unconditionally. You know why? Because we are not perfect and we can’t pretend perfection from someone else.

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Clary Lopez, author of Simplicity, Richness of Life