Naked Relationships

17 12 2007

Relationships are delicate and important for every human being. It is the way in which we connect, grow and are nurtured. We need human contact because without it we die slowly. Isolation is good for brief periods in order to go within and get to not only know ourselves but to ultimately connect to our creator. Before we can give ourselves to someone else in a relationship we must possess who we truly are. I wish I could tell you about what age this happens but it’s different for everyone. I guess it’s a personal realization that we have been fooled to believe that a state in life (single, married or in a relationship) will somehow makes us feel better about who we are and where we are going on our life journey. The truth of the matter is that we need to have a “naked relationship” with ourselves first before we can have one with anyone else. What do I mean by naked? Naked to me is bare of all the usual obstacles we put before those we interact and share our life with. No masks, no pretentions, no smoked mirrors so the other person can see who we are and freely decide to interact with us. Some of us feel scared to do something like that, it’s like going to battle without your weapons and your armor, risky. Many of us have been hurt one too many times to dare walk into a relationship without a cautious mind set, but it is that mind set that will cause us to go into another bad relationship. With every bad experience we choose one more weapon or protection to accompany us in our journey. Each attack leaves a wound, a scar, a fear. Our once soft heart becomes hard and cold even though deep inside it is as tender as it could be. Unless we find a way to peel the layers built up on it and begin again we will never be totally happy.

The beauty of a good relationship is that our soul somehow is free to merge with another without losing its individuality. It’s not to get lost in someone but to share yourself with the one you love. Before that can happen you need to be opened to the spiritual realm. I don’t believe this is something we do consciensely; we can’t decide who and how are we going to connect in our life, it just happens. We come across some incredible people in our life but unfortunately we are not going to be able to create a connection with them no matter how hard we try. I’m not sure what it is but then somehow we are able to connect to others and communicate with ease; our guard is down, our heart opened and our spirit free. I’m not sure if our disposition somehow facilitates these relationships but I believe it’s the ideal to build upon. Sometimes it takes a long time to get to this frame of mind or spiritual enlightment but I strongly suggest that you don’t get into a permanent relationship until you get it.



5 responses

17 12 2007
Tony H

The more people fail at anything (relationships, careers etc.), the more leery they become and the less likely they are to take chances; the more they hold back. It’s a dichotomy that feeds on continued failure. They will say “I’m not doing that again, cause it will probably fail, AGAIN”. When really, this is where they should be most ferociously bold. Often, failure fosters growth. You fall down (or get kicked down), you dust off and keep going. I cannot imagine going through life without giving it my all. That way, there is no regret or “shoulda, woulda, couldas”. Know what I mean?
p.s. I’m still not sure what’s under that hat!

17 12 2007

I admire you if you are able to give your all even after a failure, most people can’t do that. Most of us get up holding the broken pieces of who we were and try to mend ouselves. Yes, we grow with every experience but it is not until we tap into our spirit that we manage to become whole again in order to share ourself with another.

I telll you what’s under my hat, my BRAIN! LOL

17 12 2007

Thank you for the inspiration you instill in me and so many people. The courage to write is hard to act on when you have no idea of the worth of your product. Your blog is a testament to the fact that if you want to do it, you can.

19 12 2007

I feel a good relationship has to start out with the one little word… aqantence. I believe that one word is the key to open a door to friendship, one won’t work without the other and then a true relationship has a chance to develop.

If we don’t know our souls, how can one have a relationship with someone. We have to have a relationship with ourselves in liking ourselves before we can even have an aqantance.

I see so many people where I work always having frowns on their faces, never a smile. Just a simple “How are you” with a smile brings out the other persons soul of happiness and then can open many doors of opportunity for a chance of friendship that can turn into a relationship. That spiritual realm.

Getting to know each other better. I think the first five minutes with someone, you can figure real quick if there is a chance of a relationship developing.

I’m 51 and I’m just finding out through my poetry who I really am, understanding what my soul has always been trying to say to me as a man.

Clary, another great blog.

Arthur Henn

4 11 2008


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