Finding Meaning

31 10 2007

Life is full of dreams and expectations, nobody knows for sure what their meaning in life is. Most of the time I know when I’m on the right track when I feel at peace with what’s going on around and inside me.

We go through life and encounter new paths and stages, and every time we do so we need to make adjustments. What changes do we need to make in order to continue growing? What new things do we need to learn? What have we learned from past experiences or failures?

I’m constantly looking to learn at all levels; mentally, spiritually and in business. Looking for knowledge is my way to stay alive and motivated, optimistic about the future and the world. I find satisfaction in self-challenge in order to grow and then by achieving my goals.

I have no idea why I’m writing this today, perhaps because I’m evaluating what I have accomplished so far compared to where I was a year ago. I’ve learned to stay motivated and inspired. I’m glad I have a group of friends and associates to share my joy with. Most of all I’m glad to help others any way I can.

Comments: (from another blog)
Deep, Nice blog! I look for knowledge too.

Wednesday September 6, 2006 – 04:56pm (EDT)

Mary … Thanks for the post, so true, my granddaughter asked me today if I wished I was 21 again. I thought about it for a moment and though the idea of being YOUNG again, ( I am far from being ooooold 42) was tempting. However I shook my head no. Because if I was 21 again I would have to forfit all the knowledge and experince that I now have and I have worked hard for it! lol, but true. Thanks again for the post.

Wednesday September 6, 2006 – 08:30pm (EDT)

Miche… Amen. Very deep stuff and inspirational too.. you live your purpose and life really is quite sweet… You are doing the best job at be you that anybody could ever do!

Wednesday September 6, 2006 – 11:23pm (CDT)

Bleac… I walked an uncertain path many years ago, now I know what i want in life and it feels great. I too crave to learn new things, and each second to me is as precious as the one before. Hope you learn something new every day!

Thursday September 7, 2006 – 01:21pm (BST)

MaryQ I find myself sensitve to my path in life. I believe to feel life, not just live it. I highly recommend reading “Everything Happens for a Reason” by Mira Kirshenbaum. It’s an awesome book!

Thursday September 7, 2006 – 10:45am (EDT)

A Little Something to Help Others

30 10 2007

vete golpecito
My first Spanish children’s book.

This beautiful book comes in English also, I did the Spanish version and the best part is that 50% of the profits will go to the Hispanic Outreach program here in Bradenton, FL.

I don’t know if you believe in fate, but I’m starting to think that God works in mysterious ways. I never thought I would write a book for children but I encountered a message on a forum from someone who needed to have her book translated. I don’t go to that forum as often as I should but last week I did as I did my online visits trying to get in touch with other authors on the net; I call it online networking. I’m so glad I did because I know of Maggie Pagratis‘ good heart in everything she does. Her whole publishing is dedicated to give to different charities around the country. I’m the same way since my book Simplicity also donates 20% of the profits to a mission in Kenya. So I guess together we’ll continue a small legacy of giving to those in need.

I hope you are having a great week and that the next one is even better.

Comments: (from another blog)
Hey I will check it out for sure. He is. where you going? take care on the trip!

Friday September 8, 2006 – 04:46pm (EDT)
ducks… Offline That’s awesome!!!

Friday September 8, 2006 – 03:51pm (CDT)

LadyM… Offline Echoing the sentiment above … “How awesome!!!”

Monday September 11, 2006 – 02:45pm (EDT)

Pocke… Offline IM It’s wonderful to be able to do what you love and help people at the same time. I think that’s wonderful. When I can get my head out of the sand long enough to get published, I would love to be able to do that as well. Congratulations, and keep up the wonderful work of giving of yourself.

Tuesday September 12, 2006 – 03:50pm (EDT)
[dele… What a wonderful human beeing your are, and so beautiful too, wow(!).. Congrats with the publishing of yur book, and may it come many books to children, and perhaps adults too, from you.. Fate is true!. I wish you all the best in the world on your journey!

Wednesday September 13, 2006 – 10:33am (PDT)

Impossible Dreams

29 10 2007


I really hate the word impossible, it creates a roadblock, a let down, a resigning to something you dreamed of and that might never be. I don’t even think about it, I dream and then go for it. I believe that if we dream something it is because it is meant to be, we just need to find ways to make it a reality. Sometimes we need to give something up in order to gain others, but one question I always have in my mind is; what if I don’t even try? What if I don’t fulfill my dreams and then is all over? How would I feel at the end? Of course there are many actions and decisions that affect so many other people that you are just tied up many times, but overall I try to be true to myself and what I feel I must do.

Dreams are a window to what could be possible but it is not. It’s a yearning to dig out what is deep inside of us, it is like giving birth to your true self. When you dream everything is possible and everything works out –not so in reality– but in an ideal situation we can make things work according to our present reality. Merging the two is the ideal situation for most of us because otherwise we live a very boring and unhappy existence.

What do you think dreams are? Should we take them literally or just as a sign that something is missing? Should we try to make them a reality at whatever price or move on and linger on the thoughts forever?

Comments: (from another blog)

Hmm, you are talking about dreams in a sense of what we dream of. Alright. If humanity didn’t have dreams & IMAGINATION the world would have not progressed to where it is today (remember the G.E. ride at Epcot?). And without dreams we wouldn’t make anything different and great happen.
Nothing’s missing on us by dreaming or wishing on something. Au contraire, we gain more and it is in our nature to do that.

You don’t have to push anything to happen, so I would say, do not think of paying a price for realizing your dreams just DO NOT EVER LOSE SIGHT OF YOUR DREAMS.

Did I help? : )

Tuesday January 9, 2007 – 12:39pm (EST)
Initi… I believe in realistic dreams. Do I believe Clary in impossible – no. There is always a will and a way. And within the way – sometimes we have to amend what we have set out to do but some sit and wait for things to happen and others embark and put thier dreams into action. I think your the one that thinks of your own pursuits and then makes a “map” on how to obtain the dream/vision that you wish to create. I will never forget how many times I have had friends ask me “why are you doing that”, I didnt pay to much attention to why I was, I paid more attention to what I was doing and never waivered from it. Contemplations are sometimes areas of dreaming that then SOME do place into action.

All the best to the vibrant one!

Tuesday January 9, 2007 – 10:14am (PST)
Bleac… Our conscious dreams are our wants and needs. In my experience something is always missing, and if we just try to fill our lives with whatever we are missing it will take an eternity. And then you are old and realize you have been chasing all your life, and not living. Follow your dreams and pursue them, but control the dream, don’t let it control you.

Tuesday January 9, 2007 – 06:22pm (GMT)
Txcha… i think sometimes, daydreaming and traveling in thought with our imagination creates more dreams,many dreams of wishful thinking. BUT if you want something desperately enough or the desire for what you’ve drempt is so strong, nothing can get in the way to completely stopping that dream from reality. A few obstacles, yes, and it might take longer then you thought or it might be harder then you think to achieve your goal, but in the end you will know that you could, you can and you will at full speed ahead to gain what you most desire! Sometimes you ahve to sacrifice one thing for another or someone in the process of your focus to gain whatever you desperately want in your life or to accomplish. Life’s a game of CHess. If you never do anything, nothing will ever happen.

Tuesday January 9, 2007 – 12:33pm (CST)
Amy U… Are you talking about conscious day dreams or unconscious night time dreams?

Conscious day dream are generally our desires. I sometimes think about what I would want if I was rich and money was no object, then I think about how can I accomplish this with what I do have. The fact that I’m not rich, and money IS an object doesn’t bother me because it’s the journey that’s important, not the destination. For example, I’ve always wanted to use my art to help people and if I was rich then I’d volunteer for charitble organizations. But I’m not rich and I don’t have loads of free time to volunteer, so I found a job that fulfills the same goal while I’m in school to become an art therapist. It’s the journey that’s important.

Our unconscious night dreams are very complex and IMO can have lots of meanings. Are they wish fulfillment or indicative of our desires? Are they meant to be satisfactory in and of themselves, or are they mean to spur us into action? I think the meaning is up to the interpretation of the dreamer. I’m not going to tell anyone what their dreams mean, it’s for them to discover. It’s the journey not the destination, IMO.

Tuesday January 9, 2007 – 10:37am (PST)
DOC (… dreams… the ultimate experience… in the best environment, our minds! must they be true? will they be true? do they have to be true? can I make them true? too many questions to bother with! I say, sit back and enjoy the good ones, let go the bad ones as mere nightmares to be seen as untrue and if it seems possible…or do-able, go for the ones that feel right and good in our hearts! 🙂

Tuesday January 9, 2007 – 01:46pm (EST)
GG – … Wow, thanks so much for your insight. I guess it is about conscious dreams more than anything what I refer here, something that springs up from the heart and that you desire to accomplish or obtain.

Inesta, I love what you said: “You don’t have to push anything to happen, so I would say, do not think of paying a price for realizing your dreams just DO NOT EVER LOSE SIGHT OF YOUR DREAMS.” True my friend, thanks for reminding me that dreams also have a way to find their own way.

Jack, this really hit me: “There is always a will and a way. And within the way – sometimes we have to amend what we have set out to do but some sit and wait for things to happen and others embark and put thier dreams into action.” Yes, I map out what I want to accomplish and sometimes embark on way too much at the same time, but it is because I feel an urgency. Thanks for your thoughts.

BleachJT, your wisdon nugget follows: “Follow your dreams and pursue them, but control the dream, don’t let it control you.” I have to keep it in mind.

Chatterbox, this is so true: “if you want something desperately enough or the desire for what you’ve drempt is so strong, nothing can get in the way to completely stopping that dream from reality.” I feel the same way, unstoppable! It is what keeps me alive an enthusiastic in life.

Amy, you are so right when you say that “It’s the journey that’s important.” I will forever be in a journey. Paulo Coelho says that when he dies he wants people to say that he died LIVING. Not to dream, pursuit and achieve is to be dead, that’s for sure.

DOC, you are wise indeed when you say, “sit back and enjoy the good ones, let go the bad ones as mere nightmares to be seen as untrue and if it seems possible…or do-able, go for the ones that feel right and good in our hearts! :)” thank you my friend.

Tuesday January 9, 2007 – 02:13pm (EST)
[dele… Los sueños son los que nos hace levantarnos cada mañana, te imaginas qué horrible serían los días sin ellos? Soñar por soñar nos ayuda a vivir, como dice la canción. En lo personal siempre estoy inventando algo, una nueva meta, un nuevo sueño porque ese es mi motor. En lo general siempre trato de buscar como hacerlos realidad. No funcionó como esperaba? No importa. No perdí nada porque crecí y adquirí experiencia. Lo curioso del caso es que cuando un sueño imposible se nos materializa, uno va adquiriendo la confianza necesaria para creer que todo es posible ¡uno nunca sabe las vueltas de la vida! Qué estés bien Clary,

Tuesday January 9, 2007 – 11:23am (PST)
ducks… Dreams are simply wild fancies and hopes. They mean nothing if you do nothing to achieve them.

Tuesday January 9, 2007 – 02:01pm (CST)
The G… Dreams are meant to come true if we apply ourselves. They are important because if we believe in them and ourselves they can happen. Since we dont know the limits of our own personal potential, without dreams we would settle for mediocrity in our lives. Since many aren’t willing to put in the work to live thier dreams many people have pure fantasies instead of dreams which never come true. Dreams are windows to our possible lives that come from deep inside us and arent filtered by worry or doubt. Great post, thanx.

Tuesday January 9, 2007 – 04:10pm (EST)
Cynth… The dreams we dream while asleep are basically a reflection of what has happened during the dya, or something in our minds. I sometimes have gone to bed thinking of a particular research or math problem and found the solution in my dreams. Sometimes it takes a bit of rest to see the answer clearly. If by dreams you mean aspirations, then I believe they are a call by your soul to something you want to do, a wish to fulfill. Those dreams must be rooted in reality. You can dream all you want, but you must have a plan to achieve that dream. You work towards a goal, and that dream is the “carrot” to help you along the road. Without dreams our spirit is broken, and we just exist, not live. At the same time, if you find yourself fighting the same battle over and over again, maybe it is time to re-examine the dream, maybe tweak it, so you stay firmly grounded. When you’re sure, go for it and go for broke!

Tuesday January 9, 2007 – 07:56pm (EST)
Tony H Better to fail a thousand times than to die wondering if you should have tried.

Tuesday January 9, 2007 – 08:04pm (MST)
Inesta Ask this people now how many are gemini ; )

Tuesday January 9, 2007 – 10:38pm (EST)
Rusty Everything that has been or will be invented was a dream of someone’s. The television, the refridgerator, the airplane, the automobile. At one tme, home computers, machines that use some kind of compact disc and wrist t.v.s were though of as pure science fiction. Now they are part of everyday life.

So what does the future hold for our world and it’s dreamers?
Only time will tell.

Wednesday January 10, 2007 – 01:31am (CST)

Wednesday January 10, 2007 – 10:15am (CST)
GG – … You probably read Inesta’s question about how many of you are Gemini, maybe because she is one or because they are dreamers. I don’t know, but I’m a Taurus and I’m always dreaming…

Wednesday January 10, 2007 – 11:19am (EST)
Txcha… Pisces are day dreamers, but Taurus act upon and help keep pisces in reality and help make dreams come true….my husband is Taurus.

Thursday January 11, 2007 – 11:42am (CST)
[dele… Hi! I just logged on and received your email…It is my opinion that dreams are mental images and scenerios that are from the subconscious. I believe it is a way for the subconscious to communicate to your conscious level to convey what the brain deems important to bring to your ‘concious’ attention…One have only to decode it!

Thursday January 11, 2007 – 04:59pm (PST)
So Da… With palms together,
Great questions. From my point of view, “impossible” only means we cannot wrap our brain around something and declare it so. Dreams can be playgrounds. Enjoy them, but personally, I try not to read anything into them. Be well.

Friday January 12, 2007 – 11:12am (MST)

Why Men Marry Some Women and Not Others

28 10 2007


Note: I noticed this entry get’s a lot of readers, I would love to see your comments on it. Share your view, men or women it doesn’t matter.

I donated some books and clothing off at my local Good Will and as usual, I got off to check their used book store before I left. There are four sections that I prefer among the others; Self-Help, Classics, Reference and Religious. Yesterday I went to the Self-Help and one book got my attention, Why Men Marry Some Women and Not Others.

Marriage proposals have changed in the last decade or so, I’ve heard of women proposing to men these days, I can’t imagine that. I always wondered what goes through a man’s mind when they propose or even consider to ask a woman to marry them. What are their expectations? what leads them to believe this is the right one for them?

On the same token, I would like to know what are the characteristics that keep men far away from some women and don’t even consider them as marriage material. I have a few friends who would love to be married but can’t find anyone to propose to them. Then I know others who have 1 or more kids, have couple of failed marriages and they still get guys to ask them to marry again.

So men, if you don’t mind sharing your inner thoughts on this subject I believe women would appreciate it. It doesn’t matter if you are married, single, a single dad or divorced, tell us what would inspire you to want to share the rest of your life with someone. Inquiring minds want to know.

Comments: (from another blog)
My soon to be ex proposed to me.

Friday February 23, 2007 – 08:28am (EST)
Txcha… Hopefully I don’t get in trouble here…but I think it has to do with personality and well, mainly looks to be honest. I think there alot of reasons I can name, but just to say a few. Men are so visual, generally speaking. I know I have a friend looking as well and has had several in her life that just don’t find her interesting. But I think her issue is that she is not very inviting. It’s harder for introverts then extroverts (spelling?) and its harder for personalities that are so use to being alone. Men do not know what you are thinking ladies and if you confident and open and know what you want without being a “B” and sharing that then you might get the person you want in your life. Just a thought.

Friday February 23, 2007 – 07:31am (CST)
DeVega Confidence, Sense of Humor, Intelligence, Sensuality, Class, & most importantly RESPECT!

I like real women, not a shallow Barbie’s, responsible women who work hard & play harder. Women who are tastefully witty and a goof to hang with, great laughs are essential if we spend time together.

No man should want a woman to complete him because we need to be happy with whom we are. She should enhance his life not complete it.

Don’t bore me intellectually, emotionally, or intimately. Intelligent conversation with a beautiful woman turns me on & dumb chicks turn me off. I’m very affectionate & like the same in a woman.

Also be a lady; it’s ok to be one of the guys but, not all the time. I prefer a woman who loves being a woman & looking like one, dressed up or dressed down for beer or wine.

Be spicy, enchanting, sexy, eclectic, sensual, cultured. If she’s got sexy eyes, a nice smile, a great butt, & is a great kisser she’ll have my attention all night.

Don’t be a thug chick, that’s a turn off.

Must know how to love & allow herself to be loved. She must be my best friend, & submit to a good healthy relationship as I will do the same.

You have to have passion in life & love. Our intimate life should be a passion filled, no holds barred, uninhibited, hang from the rafters love life. She need be able to throw caution to the wind & keep me guessing and, pushing the boundaries of our intimacy to new heights & limits. Sex should be fun, passionate, sensual, spontaneous, sometimes kink, & always safe. Be open minded and willing to explore.

Oh and I don’t care how good you look. If we don’t have any chemistry, it ain’t gonna work.

She’s got to make an effort to love my family and my child.

Leave any rowdiness at the door because I don’t tolerate a drama queen with a pre Madonna attitude.

Friday February 23, 2007 – 08:35am (EST)
Txcha… No wonder my husband loves me…lol

Friday February 23, 2007 – 07:45am (CST)
GG – … Thanks for sharing your point of view Chatter Box, as a woman I see a lot of flaws on the decisions other make when looking for a guy to marry. For one, they like to party too much and too hard. Don’t get me wrong, I love to party but I know that guys don’t like to be on the scene all the time if they have someone to love and care for them at home.

DeVega, that was a great detail order. I’m sure women will thank you for that. To sum it up: “Confidence, Sense of Humor, Intelligence, Sensuality, Class, & most importantly RESPECT!”

Confidence is like a magnet and that is perhaps what is holding my friends back to find that special someone. After years of trying and missing confidence is not there anymore.

Friday February 23, 2007 – 08:59am (EST)
DeVega Tell her to respect her self but not take herself too serious. That will project out to the world. Laughing at ourselves helps a lot. Be fun to be around, not the person everyone is afraid to hurt. She’ll be fine once she’s happy with who she is. She needs to accept that first.

Friday February 23, 2007 – 09:05am (EST)
GG – … “She’ll be fine once she’s happy with who she is. She needs to accept that first.”

That’s another good point. By not being happy with whom we are, we could easily try to be everything others want us to be instead and sooner or later the real us one has to come out. This comes right along the lines of being honest and not trying to get someone to be believe you are someone you are not.

Friday February 23, 2007 – 09:16am (EST)

Friday February 23, 2007 – 08:20am (CST)
Miche… I’ve proposed to someone once… it was a mistake and it was a knee jerk reaction more than anything. He so wasn’t the one for me, and I knew it then too – but I hated losing, long story.

When Ryan proposed to me…well, I can’t even explain it. The first time h proposed I said no. I knew that I was too wrapped up in the past and too screwed up over some stuff that was going on. It had nothing to do with Ryan, but with me not being ready. But I told him to ask me again, when things settled down.

He waited… and he asked again, and this time, I jumped on it.

You can’t let a guy like him get away, let me tell you what.

I’ll point him over here and have him answer specifics about why he asked me though. He’s an amazing man… I love him very much.

Friday February 23, 2007 – 08:32am (CST)

Friday February 23, 2007 – 10:48am (CST)
Initi… It depends on the man, I have read so many women speak on men in a generalized manner. I see it as individualism. Meaning that men do somethings that are similiar in what women do.
For myself when I was married, my ex wife proposed to me while I when she saw my flight tickets and the date that I was leaving. I think the way we propose I mean as a man is dependant on what values and beliefs we have. My brother took a year before he proposed and I think he was smart with doing what he did as they have been married for 12 years now and they love each other very much.

It’s not within the proposal, it’s in the manner in which you catch the right time and that is only done by way of being spontaneous and knowing that the women you love is one that wishes for love for a lifetime and….it’s mutural.

Friday February 23, 2007 – 08:49am (PST)
winduck Looks are the determing first factor, its obvious even on this Yahoo 360, the good looking members are praised for being “so beautiful” “so gorgeous” so looks as a whole is typically the first. A beautiful woman is appreciated then… next is personality, which is another determing factor. There is the first impression to be nice, to be polite, to be a gentlemen, to be someone else who is projected to be likable (hence for some women who thought they actually knew and understood someone they liked/loved but later found “then they turned mean”) I try to personable yet maintaining that “just be yourself” thing. It is very complex, some men look only for sexy women and overlook their really bad personalities and habits. Others have these idealistic fantasies about “how ,what and who” a woman should be like, unconsciously thinking about their mothering abilities, have these generalized checklists and other little nuances. It gets even more complex as some guys woo a woman completely and once she’s “acheived” become bored and look for another. Some are attracted to women who reject them and they know this will happen.
Men in the most part, if the conditions, society, culture warranted it would enjoy several women, its almost anthropological as propagation goes; men are for quantity and women are for quality. As for me, looks catch my eye first then once I get to know her, it goes on from there. If we have a click or liking to each other, usually we overlook at lot of little annoying things we have about each other. I like her for who she is and I’m not in a relationship to change or civilize her and I hope she expects the same thing about me. I’m not looking for the “one” I guess for me, on both sides I would rather have trust and tolerance. Most woman I’ve been with (with a few and to some dismay) I’ve parted as good friends. There were a lot of marriage possiblities but I’d rather remain single.

Friday February 23, 2007 – 10:31am (MST)
winduck I agree with Michelle on one thing, “not being ready” I have a lot of personal interest going on, other activities that are more important to me. If a woman proposed to me, I would say “no”

Friday February 23, 2007 – 10:37am (MST)
[dele… Sorry Clary, this is definitely not a post I’d want to know anything about b/c I’m a woman who’s never wanted to and doesn’t want to marry!

It’ll be great for you to get feedback from the men though!

I can tell you why I’ve never been interested in marriage–it’s nothing I consider genuine. My time is very important to me, I’m very independent, and I’m only going to live once (and I don’t mean that in the selfish respect) and I’m not willing to give myself away to anyone who’s no idea of real commitment. Marriage is wishy-washy. My life deserve more from me. I have more important things I want to accomplish in my life and marriage is nothing I consider worthy.

You’d be interested in this though, I caught it on the news this morning when flicking through: Today Show on MSNBC ( had a couple of guests who were talking about love and “What is love?” I’m not sure if they had a book just coming out or not (or if they were doctors), I missed most of it but it should be on the website there somewhere (I couldn’t find it).

Good Luck!

Friday February 23, 2007 – 11:28am (PST)
[dele… P.s. that reminds me…

Jen Schefft has a book just out “Better Single Than Sorry” and I’m about to start reading it soon, I’ll be posting a review on it.

I believe women are giving up on men… I hear it all the time about how sick and tired they are of the men, their husbands and boyfriends like taking care of kids. I don’t honestly know what we need them for, women work, clean, look after the kids, run committee’s/organizations, volunteer, etc, it goes on and on. Men are constantly complaining even just to help out, all they want to do is sit around. Women are just more outgoing and willing to be the best person they can be… and they do it all without complaining. Women want to grow and accomplish. Men would rather jerk around (or off)

Friday February 23, 2007 – 11:40am (PST)
~♥Bre… Well I will give you a woman’s perspective, since you described me above… and no… I would never ask a man to marry me… I believe a man should be the man… I like feeling like a woman… but, all the power to those that do ask men… to each its own…

I think it has to do with being the kind of girl that gets a long better with guys than girls… I am not back-stabbing, petty nor gossip often like most women… I don’t get highly emotional, although my Italian comes out with passion… just not tears… I also HATE playing games… if I want something I say so, if I don’t I say so… I think I can confidently say, most men in my life have known exactly who I am… I am straight forward, open and honest… Never needy… ever!

I have been married twice, engadged 5 times… and asked many many times too… this is just my hunch on it I guess… but, then again I am not the men? Yes, I believe looks matter, but that will only get you so far… I really don’t think most men would marry for looks alone…

I think a guys like a woman he can get along with, laughter & truly enjoying eachother is always so important… strength and sensitivity combined best defines me…

Yes, and I agree somewhat with your friend above too… but, that’s another topic I guess… However, I like sharing my life with someone… having history… knowing they are by my side through thick and thin… and if not… bye, bye~

Complicated question, since it’s all relative too… *giggles* Did that all make sense? Have a wonderful weekend sweetie~ xx

Friday February 23, 2007 – 01:43pm (PST)
[dele… P.s. I sent this guy ( your way here to read this particular blog–he wants to get married.

Friday February 23, 2007 – 03:19pm (PST)
GG – … The truth of the matter is that marriage is not an universal vocation. Most people are called to it but many are not. The main thing is to make the most out of it. But for those who feel they would like to, but for some reason haven’t been able to be married there is a question of why. There are necessary characteristics a person must have and most of all an overall aptitude and willingness to sacrifice to make it possible. That’s my humble opinion.

Saturday February 24, 2007 – 08:15am (EST)
gary g Pretty difficult to chronicle all the things that I look for when searching for a life long companion, even in general terms there a many things I find appealing as well as unappealing. I guess the list could go on forever. But to try and highlight a few preferences here’s my shopping list?
First, last and most important, chemistry, chemistry and chemistry. Whether I find a woman attractive, not so attractive, petite, voluptuous, tall, short, sophisticated, refined, intelligent or what other adjective you’d like to use it really comes down to chemistry and whether or not it matches. I’ve never really had a preference in ethnic background, age (within a reasonable range), wealth or religion. I find eyes; a genuine smile and a pleasant manor in speech will attract me quicker than the typical eye candy types that can only offer one dimension in a relationship. I guess this is what’s needed to attract my initial interest.
Once I’ve found someone who meets those criteria there has to be some common ground that will allow growth as friends, not that we would have to think with the same brain, but at least share enough interest in things that would allow for conversation and discovery of how the other ticks. Personally I call this the discovery stage, it’s a very interesting time, tons of work but overall very exciting and enjoyable. If you skip this portion or you’re not honest then you’re opening a door to misery, you might wind up with someone that’s a complete stranger and you won’t be able to figure out why they are so distant from the person you thought you knew. While your in the discovery phase of a relationship you should feel something tugging at your heart, you should find yourself more attached to the sound of her voice, in awe as you’re looking at her facial features and just find that you’re wanting to smile and never end your time together. If you’re not feeling these things, be careful, you may be making a good friend, but don’t confuse that with a life long partner. If you’re the least bit observant you’ll know how she’s feeling about you as well. What I find most important during this phase is whether or not we are able to hold eye contact for more than 10 seconds while we’re speaking to each other, can we even hold a conversation for more than 10 minutes, does the conversation always have to carry a topical theme or can we just converse about anything and have it lead to a number of topics as the conversation evolves? If you’re unable to carry a conversation you’d probably better look elsewhere. Really important for me, are we both comfortable if neither is saying anything? Then a sure tale tale is whether or not there is plenty of laughter while you’re together. I don’t care if you’re the dullest person in the world, if there’s no laughter while you’re together it’s a sure sign that one of you really isn’t enjoying the company of the other, even more critical; you’re not equally yoked. If you’re completely interested in the person you’re with but find you’re more in awe of that person than enjoying their company, you’re not bringing enough to the relationship to make it last and that will spell trouble down the road. So if you find yourself in this situation where you’re in awe but can’t loosen up enough to laugh with them, then you’d be better off not getting too deeply involved.

Another aspect that I pay close attention to the sort of priority does she command in my life. If for example when the phone rings, do I tell others to wait while I talk to her or do I wait for a more convenient time to call her back? If the later is true, we probably won’t last very long as a couple. This priority should last forever, not in just the first couple of years.
For me the most important reaction I pay close attention to is myself, do I find myself thinking of ways to make myself a better person for her sake.

Had more to say but ran out of room, hope this said enough.

Saturday February 24, 2007 – 07:31pm (CST)
Amy U… Very interesting! And great input from everyone!

I have a friend who has been married but she was in bad relationships with drug users. Now she has changed her life and would like to be in a healthy marriage but she’s afraid she’ll never get married because she’s over 40. She could live happy for the rest of her life without remarrying, but she would like to share her new and improved life with someone. I hope that when she’s ready for a relationship she’ll be able to find someone who will be able to appreciate her.

Monday February 26, 2007 – 10:36am (PST)

Being Grateful – excerpt from Simplicity, Richness of Life

27 10 2007

Having all the comforts that life has to offer can make us ungrateful, self-centered people who take everything for granted. I know I have fallen into this trap. Maybe you haven’t thought of all the things you take for granted, like a new day. Even your next breath is given to you because God wills it for you along with your health, your home, your car, your family, your children, food, clothing, work and much more. Taking things for granted makes us lose the appreciation we should have for the people, material possessions and abundant blessings in our lives. We miss what is of real value in our lives and , therefore, fall into unhappiness and despair. We are creatures composed of body and soul and , likewise, there are aspects of our nature that we need to attend to and develop on a regular basis. If we ignore part of our nature, it’s almost impossible for us to be able to live and grow as healthy spiritual individuals.

Being grateful is like opening the door to one aspect of our nature and allowing it to be nurtured and strengthened. Letting God be part of your daily life and thanking him for everything is a good practice. God created us in His image with a unique mission. Each mission is exclusive and needs to be brought to fruition so that we can achieve our higher purpose and give the glory back to God. Not being able to discover what that mission is in your life, might bring insecurity, unhappiness, emptiness, feelings of lack of fulfillment, and sometimes even tragedy into your life, but most of all, the important work needed for the world won’t see the light of day. That’s why it is so important for you to start by being grateful for God’s blessings and talents given to you. Develop them and, along with daily communion with him and prayer, you will be able to find out what your mission and purpose is in your life.

Excerpt from Simplicity – Richness of Life


It’s Not About the Money

25 10 2007


How many times have I heard this phrase from writers, I guess it is a common denominator among artists. We come to love the arts in whatever shape and form that might be and can’t contain our creativity in any way. Money is not the object but the expression of what is within bursting to come out.

Of course we would like to be able to make money with our work, that would help us do what we love full time. We long to touch hearts, to impact minds, to make a difference and maybe to live forever through our work. When I go to the Ringling Museum I feel the energy that the artist’s soul transmit through their painting, sculptures and photography. When I listen to an orchestra, a jazz player or watch a play I hear and see what only an artist can share with an audience; their essence, their feeling, emotions, their philosophy in one word “self”. Nothing could be more pure and sublime than to touch someone’s soul and I believe you can do that with artists even they might not be physically close to you.

There is a great letter that John Paul II wrote, Letter to Artists, and I like to read it from time to remind me of the great gifts God had given artists and what they should do with it. To me is not about the money either but about leaving a legacy behind that would testify of my existence and about not taking with me what has been given to me to share.


Dave Offline Thanks for the reminder. I don’t worry about leaving a legacy. Just would like to help others through my work. If all that means is being able to put a smile on their face for a few minutes, then that’s OK too.

Tuesday November 14, 2006 – 09:26am (PST)

[dele… I am not really concerned about making any money or fame from my poetry..if I can touch someone with one of my poems…then I am satisfied.
huggs and kisses

Tuesday November 14, 2006 – 10:31am (PST)

Jess Offline That is a lovely way to look at it. Art for the love of art.

Wednesday November 15, 2006 – 01:37pm (EST)

Tony H Offline IM WHAT? It’s not about the money? That’s it then I quit! LOL. Nice post.

Saturday November 18, 2006 – 02:50am (MST)

LadyM… Offline Great post … and I agree with you … for me, it’s about the creation of emotion in others — either through the written word, pictures, sculpture, acting, etc … all forms … it’s about sharing that emotion. Thanks for sharing the Holy Father’s letter. It’s the first time I’ve read it … and it did move me …

Saturday November 18, 2006 – 02:47pm (EST)

Archer Offline IM Nice Post.

Take Care.


Sunday November 19, 2006 – 03:57am (PKT)

gary g Offline Having been a musician for so many years I have jumped back and forth on this issue. I’d even taken a few years’ hiatus at one point after playing for 6 years in Branson and touring with few Nashville acts. I’d come to a point where I’d lost my compassion and love for performing. That great feeling you had when you hear something touching your soul, that made your body move, and knowing you were part of that music had left. It had been lost in the business end of this little ride. It can be better understood by reading a blog I wrote a couple of weeks ago “Sharing the Love”. I’m back to a place where the money isn’t the issue, having fun with the music and enjoying the people it’s performed and shared with takes a front seat to “How much does the gig pay?”.

Sunday November 26, 2006 – 11:10am (CST)

Initi… Offline Tremendously valid desire and rich with good ethics of a real person that wishes to do something constructive within life whereby the byproduct may be something in material however that isnt the objective in doing it. Nicest writing I have read….

Sunday November 26, 2006 – 11:13pm (PST)

GG – … Offline Thanks for all your comments, I guess there is a common thread among artists.

Don’t worry Tony, even though money is not the motivation many artists land upon it for making great works, we might be among them.

Monday November 27, 2006 – 08:36am (EST)

Source of Inspirations

24 10 2007

(Originally posted on 2006)

I feel a little nostalgic today. Why do you ask? Because I miss my most influencial source of inspiration, my mom. Here is her picture with me on her last visit a few months ago. She turned 70 last week and what a happy day that was. She has been in and out of the hospital in the last two years but she is finally doing well.

I’ll never forget my last visit to Puerto Rico right after one of her surgeries and the misdiagnosed lymphoma that threw my whole world upside down. You see, my mom is not only my mother, she is my friend and my inspiration. I hope to be all that she is even though I know I come so short of that goal.

She is the one who put me in the path of writing and at 12 or 13 I won a literary award for a biography I did on St. Peter. She also writes but haven’t published anything yet. She is a concern citizen who writes about today’s issues and do so beautifully. I don’t know if she ever have sent any of those letters to the press but they do deserve to be read by all the young people. She sees the wrong in society and offer solutions and it’s always optimistic about the future. As a wife she is an example of holiness and service to her husband, they don’t make wives like that anymore. Now it is all about equality when there is so much beauty in our differences and a way to live a joyful life under a rainbow of characteristics that make men and women unique individuals.

I’m blessed to have this source of inspirations and I’m sure you have yours as well. Treasure them and share them with the world. Let them know how important they have been in your life.

Mom, without you I would not be who I am today. I’m a better person for knowing you and most of all for being loved by you.

Happy Birthday!


Awesome and Inspiring! I lost my Mom almost 2 years ago… and we never got to our unfinished buisness. But that aside, she was a wonderful woman and I miss her terribly! You are doing great by her… this blog just proves it more! HUGS! 🙂

Tuesday October 3, 2006 – 11:31am (EDT)

Fut Offline They say to achieve greatness, you must first never take anything as second best. Once you only accept the best out of yourself and others, then and only then will you exceed your goals. Forget who said it and doing a quick search on some quote sites doesn’t reveal it either, but I have lived by that goal for the last 2 years one day at a time to overcome addiction. And somehow it works for me.

Tuesday October 3, 2006 – 12:07pm (EDT)

Steve… Offline IM Very well done.. It’s so inspiring to see a child honor the parent..the one who nurtured and gave life.

Tuesday October 3, 2006 – 11:25am (CDT)

Archer Offline IM Ms. Clary, Beauty and holiness does not need to be justified; for they themselves are proof of their existance. You and your mother are perfect examples of beauty and holiness combined in one individuality as womanhood in full bloom. I totally agree with you that as wife, today’s ladies don’t make wives like your mother anymore. The example like your mother as a wife are very and scarce.
Happy Birth Day to your Mom. She is a Libra, ruled by planet Venus of Love aesthetics and beauty. And believe me, she really is perfect example.
Take Very Care of Yourself.

Wednesday October 4, 2006 – 12:06am (PKT)

Inesta Offline Beautiful! both of you, of course : )

Tuesday October 3, 2006 – 07:57pm (EDT)

cosic… Offline IM This is one of the most beautiful blogs I have ever read. What a wonderful lady your mother is. And what a wonderful daughter you are to tell this story in such a sensitive and loving manner. If the photo is a recent one she looks amazing for 70! WoW! Please convey my warmest wishes to her for continued happiness in her life. How lucky you are to have each other…


Wednesday October 4, 2006 – 03:40pm (BST)

GG – … Offline Thanks for all your comments, to me is an honor and priveledge to be her daughter. The picture was taken in May of this year, so that is how she looks now. I will convey your good wishes on her birthday, she will be thrilled.

Wednesday October 4, 2006 – 10:54am (EDT)

melvy… Offline IM where will we be without our moms? They were always there when everyone else has deserted us… When we were down and out, mom was there to talk it out and turn us around. Just like your mom, my mom was very supportive even when I have gone astray (of other people’s expectations) and believed in me… that I could realize the dreams of a better future. Hurray for the moms!

Thursday October 5, 2006 – 06:24am (EDT)

ƹllɇṙɏ Offline Buen trabajo! mi Mama escribia versos y me gustaban y escribi mi primer poema a los 10 por inspiracin a ella ya que le escribia cartas desde los 5. Bueno saludos a tu madre y espero que escribas sabiamente por muchos a~nos mas! Ltr


Friday October 6, 2006 – 05:09pm (EDT)

lex Offline IM It was a beautiful relationship between mother and daughter…My best wishes to both of you and Happy Birthday Mom!

Sunday October 8, 2006 – 05:56am (PDT)

archi… Offline IM you are blessed with a terrific mom… you owe it to her. both of you are good example of a healthy mom & daughter relationship. best wishes to your writing career! belated happy birthday Mom!

Tuesday October 10, 2006 – 11:13pm (SGT)

Kaoss Offline Wow, that is so great that you have such a relationship with your mom and that she is so inspirational to you. That is very beautiful for sure.

Saturday October 14, 2006 – 10:57pm (EDT)