The “I Need a Friend” Project

How many times have you found yourself in a difficult situation with nobody to turn to?

Then you might be interested in participating on this project called
“I Need a Friend”

Find out how to participate and get the support and help you need from people who are willing to share their advice and personal knowledge with others in need. Our physical, emotional and spiritual health depends on how well we process our daily experiences and how we face challenges and problems in our life. Don’t wait another day. Talk to a friend.

Straight to the Heart

The idea is to write it so that people hear it and it slides through the brain and goes straight to the heart. –Maya Angelou

Way before we can touch anyone’s heart we need to be able to touch our own, buried many times under life everyday pressures, responsabilities, goals and dreams. Taking time everyday to see where you are; physically, mentally and spiritually is important in order to mantain a balance. I know by experience how life can get far away from our intended vision, we drift to so many activities that has nothing to do with the path we wanted to travel that sometimes we find ourselves lost. As a woman we many times tend to give way more than we receive and then we forget to nurture ourselves in order not to let our well run dry. It is a difficult task to keep ourselves in the picture of our life and yet if we don’t it comes a point when we feel we have ceased to exist. Yes, we are here physically but our essence, our uniqueness, our gifts and talents have been pushed to the side in order to provide support and nourishment to the inmediate need at hand.

Perhaps that is what we are called to do at a certain stage of our life but then comes a time for things to come. Coming to terms to the realization is not easy for many people, especially to those around us, who only see it as a threat to their “balance” in life.

I guess the soul is not content until it is able to do what it was created to accomplish to begin with. There is a nagging sensation to move on and complete its mission.To become what it is on its own and then be shared with those we love. To be free to move around and do its work. Ultimately to be cherished and appreciated for what it is and not for what we pretend it to be.

Have you noticed how different dead people look from when they were alive? Their soul departs from the body and changes its complete outlook. I believe that to a point the same happen to us when we hindred our soul in any way. The more we suppress its nature and block its work the more it shows on the outside. My grandmother was a different person while my granfather was alive, she kept the necessary balance and peace by restraining her very soul, I believe. When he passed away she blossomed into a new creature, one I didn’t know. I was able to talk to her more and she was free to speak her mind. She even looked younger and lived many years enjoying her kids, grankids and great-grandkids. I called her the travelling grandma because every six months she was off somewhere to meet extended family members. I used to call and write to her frequently and let her know how much I loved her. One thing she never did was complain about any physical illness even if she had it, only my aunt who lived with her would know about it but only when it got too hard for her to handle.

I’m reaching deep within right now, hoping to have something to offer those around me. I want it to be pure, sincere and full of emotion. It will be the only way to let the grace flow and let a beautiful transformation take place. I’ve done as much as I can for now but there are new tasks, new goals, new vision and the great call to my personal mission whatever that might be. I know in time it will be revealed to me and only then I will be able to go straight to the heart.

Die Living, Not Dead

“And death is possibly the most important thing. We are all walking towards death, but we never know when death will touch us and it is our duty, therefore, to look around us, to be grateful for each minute. But we should also be grateful to death, because it makes us think about the importance of each decision we take, or fail to take; it makes us stop doing anything that keeps us stuck in the category of the “living dead” and, instead, urges us to risk everything, to bet everything on those things we always dreamed of doing, because, whether we like it or not, the angel of death is waiting for us.”– Paulo Coelho

What is life supposed to be? Mere existence or a sum of experiences fully lived? I wonder as we somehow get from living each and every moment to navigating on autopilot through life. When did all of this happen and why? Life is not static, it evolves and changes and sometimes those changes are not welcomed or accepted. Familiarity and comfort is regarded with stability but there comes a time when we may not feel that way anymore. I guess our outlook changes the moment we face death. Dying is such a final state even to those of us who believe in resurrection that it makes us dig deep within ourself. In order to rise to eternal life we must experience death, the same goes when we are to experience a necessary transformation in our life, something has to die inside of us in order to be re-born. We know a transformation is necessary because there is a nagging sense of pain and sorrow within we can’t shake off from our soul. The more we resist it the more it hurts.

These periods of our life have been called many things but my favorite so far is Dark Nights of the Soul, Thomas Moore wrote a book with that title and as I read it I identify to all that I’m feeling at this moment. I don’t agree with everything he writes but the core of the matter is there and I can relate. I was studying St. John of the Cross writings months before I came to this stage in my life and in a way I see it as the prelude to a great transformation of mind and spirit in order to connect fully to what God had in mind for my life.

This is a short passage from Dark Nights of the Soul:

Your dark night is preparing you to be yourself. It is reenacting your birth as a person. It is offering you an alternative to absorption in your manipulative culture.

Your dark night is forcing you to consider alternatives. It is taking you out of the active life of submission to alien goals and purposes. It is offering you your own approach to life. You can sit with it and consider who you are and who you want to be. you can be fortified by it to stand strong in your very existence. You can be born again, not into and ideology that needs your surrender, but into yourself, your uniqueness, your God-given reality, the life destined for you.

The question now is if we are going to let our life to evolve and be transformed or if we are going to continue to hide behind our fears and begin to die inside? It takes courage to move on to an unknown path but it is ultimately a matter of life or death of our own spirit.

Preparing for the Unknown

There is a new chapter, new events, a new problem or situation, you know is coming but you have no idea what it is or how to prepare for it. Is there such a thing as to prepare yourself for the unknown? Should we waste energy on something you know nothing about? Perhaps not.

I know mine is coming and all I’m trying to do right now is to relax and don’t think too much on how I imagine everything will be. At this point I know well nothing I imagine will be what will happen at the end. Attitude is what I need to concentrate and a spirit of acceptance. Maybe I should take with me The Power of Positive Thinking by Norman Vincent Peale, better grab it now before I forget.

The right mental and emotional attitude helps assimilate better the big and small unknown situations in our life. Your mind remains receptive and alert ,opened to ideas and able to create solutions for the situations and circumstances that threaten to throw you out of balance. I tend to be the “strong” in the family, able to communicate, guide and protect those I love. I can hide the turbulence inside as long as needed to in order to offer others the estability and support they need for their trials. What I need to figure out is how to sustain myself in order not run out of energy, hope and love. Quiet time and meditation has helped me for many years so I will continue to do so as I go along my path.

When you are caring for others it makes sense to care for yourself first. In order to give you need to have. For many years I’ve tried to do things on my own, only God is allowed into my deepest needs and worries. Now, I feel is time to open up to others who might be able to help me as well. God works in different ways and through different people so I must be aware to detect when that happens and welcome it with an open mind.

So to me the ultimate way to prepare myself for the unknown is to tune in to myself and be opened to the endless possibilities that might come my way in order to help me accomplish my mission.

Ways of Communication

There are many ways to communicate today compared to fifty or sixty years ago. Not that I’ve lived long enough to have experienced what we had back then, but I’ve read about the challenges of those days to communicate compared to today’s communication connecting more people in the shortest amount of time possible. This can be good and bad.

I enjoy writing as a way to communicate, it enables me to take time to sit down and put on paper my thoughts and intentions, it’s tangible. It’s something you can read over and over again, it can be treasured.

The phone is another way of communication I utilize but not as frequently; I use it mainly for business purposes or for personal calls that need immediate attention.

E-mail is yet another way to communicate which I also utilize for business and to send a written message I need deliver right away. I don’t waste much time on chain letters. I like to receive personal messages instead of forwarded messages even though some of them are beautiful.

Visits and get togethers are the ones I enjoy the most, all your senses get involved on this one and you can feel the warmth of those who interact in a given place. I wish I could visit more frequently but time and distance sometimes prevents it. I need to make a big effort to create time to make it happen on a regular basis.

The way we communicate and with whom has a lot to do with the level of comfort we feel with each other. Some people attract more sincere conversations than others just because they are not uptight and judgemental about every little thing you say. Others keep you at bay because they are shut down inside from the rest of the world. Others seem to be opened but try to analyze you or get to know you but it’s only to attack you, to find faults and flaws. While you are talking to them they are trying to figure out “your intentions” according to their own preceptions disregarding yours. Those, I’m afraid to say, don’t get much communication with others either, specially from me.

The Meaning of my Name

What Clary Means

You are very open. You communicate well, and you connect with other people easily. You are a naturally creative person. Ideas just flow from your mind. A true chameleon, you are many things at different points in your life. You are very adaptable. You are relaxed, chill, and very likely to go with the flow. You are light hearted and accepting. You don’t get worked up easily. Well adjusted and incredibly happy, many people wonder what your secret to life is. You are usually the best at everything … you strive for perfection. You are confident, authoritative, and aggressive. You have the classic “Type A” personality. You are wild, crazy, and a huge rebel. You’re always up to something. You have a ton of energy, and most people can’t handle you. You’re very intense. You definitely are a handful, and you’re likely to get in trouble. But your kind of trouble is a lot of fun. You are a free spirit, and you resent anyone who tries to fence you in. You are unpredictable, adventurous, and always a little surprising. You may miss out by not settling down, but you’re too busy having fun to care.

What’s Your Name’s Hidden Meaning?