Expectations

Today I woke up with this in mind, expectations. I don’t want to have any, and I want to navigate my day according to the waves I encounter along the way. I did a search on the topic on my blog because I knew I wrote about this before and what I wrote still resonates today.

Here it is one more time, tell me what you think about expectations and the best way you go about it in your life. I wish you an unexpected wonderful day!!

http://clary.wordpress.com/2008/04/17/expectations-2/

The Way We Measure

We measure many things; our behavior, our talents, our tolerance, our kindness, our emotions, our love, our commitments, etc. As you can tell from my examples I am talking about our qualities or faults measure against someone else. I guess I never paid much attention to it before but lately it is really bothering me, perhaps because I can clearly see how short we all come to perfection, to that image we want to portray many times and that is very far from reality. I have never claimed to be perfect, good, talented, or anything like that. I do recognize some of my gifts but I try not to talk about it or compare myself to anyone. I do try to emulate good people even though I know I fail many times and come short to many of their best qualities and virtues. That is the reason why it really bothers me when someone goes into their high chair and hit their breast while they list the number of ways they are better than the person next to them for whatever reason. It bothers me because in the process they put down other individuals around them, it might not be intentional and they might not realize how the other person feels, but they do hurt and sometimes humiliate others.

This Bible verse says it clearly:

“He said to them, “Take heed what you hear. With whatever measure you measure, it will be measured to you, and more will be given to you who hear.” Mark 4:24

And it has been in my mind for a long time. Every person is different and everyone will decide for themselves in which way to respond to different situations and responsibilities in their life even though you had the opportunity and privilege to raise or teach them. In the end it is on them and we get no more respect from anyone by telling others how good we are. Let’s learn to be humble and to keep our mouth shot most of the time, it will serve us well and let other instead tell us how good or bad we are.

Holding It In

For the longest time we have been trained to hold things up. Living in a society demands that sometimes we don’t speak of certain topics or opinions. When it comes to relationships it is pretty much the same but one thing I know is that no communication=no relationship. Holding in opinions, emotions, hurt, ideas, disagreements, etc takes a toll on anyone. There is a fine line between being honest and rude, between expressing our frustration and insulting someone in the process. At times is best to just walk away. Words can’t never be taken back but not because of it we are to be so afraid to utter them, in some occasions they are essential to help resolve a situation.

Holding things in for too long only leads to an imminent explosion and out of control situation. There is only so much we all can take and for our own emotional and health we need to learn to release from time to time.

What is your experience with holding it in? Have you learned ways to release in order not to create too much pressure that will provoke an “explosion”?

Unspoken Words

If only Michael knew…
I was listening to the radio the other day and they were playing a few of Michael Jackson’s songs, all the sudden a fan got on the line and express what Michael and his music meant to him. It was moving, it was profound, such beautiful sentiments and words to transmit something I wished Michael heard while he was alive. Who knows if he would have listened to those words, all those words spoken at the time of his death if that who have had some impact on how he view his life and help him in some way. They were the same words that went unspoken for so long for him.

I guess we can take that lesson and if someone has impacted our life in such a profound and meaningful way we should express it loudly, so that the world will hear it somehow. I am guilty to think that the ones I love will live forever and that somehow, by the way I act and the things I do, they know how I truly feel but the truth is that they need to hear the words while I look deep into their eyes. I am having the time to reflect upon many things now and while I do I try to see what could be changed for the better. It might be unfamiliar ground but the reward will be strength, strength I did not know I had and the power of words to express what is in my heart.

There is way more to come, I know and yet I am okay with it. I guess I will try to let go of the tight route I had in mind and for once explore and be surprised with new discoveries. It is not always fine to live life knowing exactly (or trying) what comes next. It will be best to be really good at navigating our vessel in order to face whatever comes our way and at the same time make sure we speak the words straight from the heart not waiting til tomorrow.

What is your experience with unspoken words?

Book Launch Preparation

As the time draws near to the moment I have worked so hard for, I can not help but to also feel anxious.

I pray that my next book, Moonlit Walks, offers my readers a reason for hope in these difficult times when it is hard to look for that positive glimpse in our daily circumstances. It is the only way to move on and let our life be transformed into what is meant to be.

I don’t offer solutions to individual situations but one thing I can do is to share with you my journey in order to inspire others to begin their very own journey. In the same way that I offered in Simplicity, Richness of Life, my experiences on raising a family and learning to live simpler in order to do what matters in my life, on Moonlit Walks I will explore many other topics that I deemed worthy to reflect upon and explore. It is the only way I know how to navigate my life and the turmoils it sometimes accompanies it, one that perhaps will help others to do the same in their own unique way until they too find themselves in come waters.

Life is not easy sometimes but it becomes bearable when we share it with those around us. I believe that is why many of us are having a hard time today, we have disconnected ourselves from each other in pursuit of our own dreams. We have lost the sense that family, friendship and community is what makes us prosper in the long run, not merely individuality. We treasure who we are, yes, but never forgetting that we are also called to share ourselves with others. It is a way to enrich life and to make it more meaningful. It is to give it reason for its existence.

Stay tuned for the announcement on the launch of Moonlit Walks, I will try to make it as memorable as the moments that inspired it.

State of Mind

Today I have been reading a book about tough times, then I am compelled to come here and read back on some of the entries I made a few days ago. I am looking for signs, for a reason to hold on, for a glimpse at words that I am sure did not come from me but were inspired to help others -including me- to move along to trust and hope. A lot of my writing comes from the time I take to listen to others, from prayers and quiet moments I spend in meditation and recollection. Today it is me who needs that consolation, that hope that everything will be alright, that even though many things do not feel right I will find a find a way to make it better.

I can not lose hope on a future that awaits me, a future that with its uncertainty is making me feel uneasy. Perhaps you have felt like that many times and maybe you would like to share the way you feel or felt at those moments.

My strength is being tested beyond measure it seems at times, and then come the developments of virtues I never had but need. It is a painful and difficult crucible and I must go forward until I come to the end.

Let Me Hear From You

Today I thought about you and what are you going through. Tell me about your day, your challenges, your worries. I share on this blog a lot of different topics and describe many situations for you to reflect upon, but today I want to hear it from you. Would you tell me?

Screwing Up the Next Generation

I often wonder what can we truly expect from the next generation? It is clear to me that the way we raise them will determine the kind of individuals they will be and what I see happening around me is not offering me much hope.

It amazes me how lazy and irresponsible some kids are today, they are hardly held accountable for their actions and don’t have to do much in order to get all the conveniences they enjoy like a car, cell phone and computers. Some people think I am strict but my job is to raise kids that will eventually contribute something good to society. In the past parents watched out for each others kids and they were respected by the teens or kids in the neighborhood, today hardly nobody takes the time to even get to know their neighbors. I still believe that parents have the strongest influence on their kids but unfortunately these days parents want to be friends more than parents and they don’t believe that their kids are able to make the right choices for themselves. Obedience, respect for authority, following the law are all things that I teach and expect from my children but once they step out my door there is a whole different set of boundaries in their friend’s homes.

I was always amazed at how minors were able to smoke and drink freely when it is illegal. How do they get their stuff?? Sometimes they get it through older friends but now days most of them get them from their parents, and their parents allowed them to do it home because “they are going to do it anyway” so they might as well do it at home where they have “some control.” Wow! I don’t see how is that going to help them and what about the kids that aren’t theirs? What happens to them when they get behind the wheel of a car drunk? Is that what we are teaching our kids these days? That it is okay to brake the law as long as their parents know? I believe parents are doing a disservice to themselves, their children and to society as a whole, by the time they are 21 years old -if they have survived- they are either alcoholics or with some kind of record for misbehavior with the authorities, or a DUI. Excellent way to start! We as parents need to step up to the plate and show them by example the way things are and teach them to respect laws and authority. It all begin with us and if it doesn’t I don’t know what kind of individuals are going to run this nation 10-20 years from now. Sometimes I feel like I am swimming against the current and sooner or later will drown because I see no lifesaver coming my way. I feel totally alone on my points of view. Am I too old fashioned or do certain values always prevail no matter the times? I believe that there are some fundamental truths that never change and these are one of them.

What is your opinion?

Obama’s First Mistake

There was so much hope for a new President, so many dreams of a better future and positive changes and here we are, Obama’s great first mistake.

He struck down the ban on giving federal money to international groups that perform abortions or provide abortion information. Too bad that it was one that will kill millions of Americans. People think that this nation’s state is due to bad financial decisions and the war but it is not, this is about life and the complete disrespect people have of it. There is a high price to pay for killing innocent infants before they are even born, so when you see things get worse instead of better as the time goes by take notice of how many Americans have died because we play god and don’t complain.

If you think bring our troops back home will solve our problems and that we will be saving lives that way, I am afraid you are mistaken. I respect the military and what they do in keeping our nation free and safe. Few people would sacrifice the way they do.

The worst war we have in our hands is the one against evil and abortion is just one of the many battles that will brings us down, that along the numbness many seem to be in by mistakenly think that they have a right over their body and don’t realize that the baby is not their body.

I will brace myself for whatever will befall this nation because I am sure that God can’t keep blessing a country who kills their own for this long.

Unexpected Lessons

The perpetual school of life keeps presenting me with a whole new course of unexpected lessons. Some of them are a retake of something I didn’t grasp the first time around and then others I have no idea they existed. Dealing with these unexpected lessons can be frustrating, half the time I don’t even want to be present.

-Why in the world should we go through it and most of all do what we said we will never do, if we encountered the situation?
I guess thinking of what we would do if a situation arose and doing when it does are two different things.

Never in my life I imagined having to dig deep within in order not to crumble on the outside. I am very good at moving along no matter what happens in my life but this time it is so very hard to do. I have been deeply wounded and I feel like I have been drained of all strength; physically, mentally and emotionally. At the same time I know I am not the first or only person who has gone through this before, I can survive.

I believe I accepted the challenge to take this unexpected lesson but at the same time I am looking for ways not to. I guess it is the realization that nothing will ever be the same, that could be good and bad. I think this is a good opportunity to step outside my city walls and expose my real self. I need to be who God created me to be and nothing less, whoever embraces me will be embracing the true essence of someone who has been buried for a very long time in order to become what I thought would be acceptable to the world. I have learned that to pretend is not to live and not to live is not what God meant for any of us. We need to be proud of who he created us to be and wait for those who would accept and love us just the way we are. This will be the moment of truth and it will take me to unknown and unfamiliar places but whatever that is it will be fine.

Have you gone through some unexpected lessons? What did you learn from them?